heavy ~


ten thousand more
and none to matter
but for this
I’ve come to know
string of golden suns
reminding –
hope within
each letting go
spun around
my heart so heavy
sprinkled salt
amid the stars –
winds so fierce
I scarce can carry
all I am
to where you are

. . .

softened by stone ~


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5:21 AM

tells a story
you already know
when night wraps
her empty

odd sets of linen
softened by stone
are stored
with the rest

silence so sweet
no words could compare
touching on places
left of us

flannel I bought
the same thread of grey
as your eyes
a river
destinies trade
for moments
like the hush of my name

cotton worn through
by yesterday’s prayer
by lace

. . .

arms not as long ~


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I was an only child
for a year or two –
selfishly taking of kisses
a moment or more
wouldn’t matter that much
until another was come
to arms not as long
with eyes the same shade
of carry me home

How soon disregarding
a half distant drum –
and tears
once cried just for me
nights where the pillow
held no allure –
dreams I spent walking
alone until dawn

Spied from afar
a trembling flame –
shadows cast over
the lawn
mandolins playing
where have you gone
as I ran ahead
into love that was mine

. . .

harbinger ~


warm is the spot
where leaving you left
burrowed in woolen
whispering sighs
red painted feathers
where moss put to rest
the passing of cold
into winter’s caress
earrings carved
from the tallest of pines
swishes and sway
o’er my shoulder
lustrous clawing of one
into one
backward I came
seeking refuge in art
save me regretting
the reasons I fell –
let me tell lies
to my heart

. . .

An odd inspiration. Earrings received for my birthday….

a little ~


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twas late
for the season
berries and passion
before e’er another
conceived us to be
where the sweet
lull of lavender wafted
the summer
well past the turning
of (wishes to) leaves
when dragons hummed
at the mention of dark
louder than any
were known to recall
honeybee sunsets
cicadas when all we were
wanting was some
other reason to count
without counting
back (missing)
the swell of July
and the bittersweet
sting of blackberry
why did you go
when knowing I’d grieve
you (a little) this way
or write to your
(some other one day)
when honeysuckle
bloomed past the edges
of june
(unashamed of her
timing) –
her wasted perfume

. . .

lovers ~


I’ve wandered so far
from the place of beginning
e’en now, I scarce can recall…
the sound of my laughter (a giggling squeal)
from miles past the pasture
or just down the hall
where you hid without meaning
to make me afraid –
never meant you would frighten me so
a dream or two chasing
(do you remember that now)
how we ran without knowing
how far we might go
another life living and I was fifteen
more than my mother the day you were born
I’ve squandered a lifetime
making ready for this
your arms wrapped around me
the taste of your kiss…
my name where words used to be.

. . .

sewn together ~


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reminders (2)

Yesterday afternoon, I spoke at length with a friend in California. It’s been almost 30 years since I worked for her husband, George.

Two months ago, George stumbled while mowing the yard and subsequent check-ups found him suffering due to an inoperable tumor, brain cancer. He’s not likely to make it through the week. But for a little while, we laughed and I shared stories of what a bear he was to work for at first. How could he have known he had met his match when he hired me, that his gruff exterior would be worn away by a girl with different beliefs and hand-me-down boots?

It seemed to fit.   This past week has been a time of extreme tenderness for me. My father was moved to a hospital near to my house, where he stayed for more than a week as doctors worked to rid him of an infection that was not only hindering his healing, but negating his ability to communicate effectively about what was hurting. Whispers couldn’t be interpreted and many a tear was shed over something that might have been nothing – words no one could understand.

And there was laughter as well – an evening when my father recognized neither me or my sister, and surely fell in love with both of us as we cared for his aches and washed his tired eyes.

Writing has been something on my mind, but left to the margin of most of my days.

Early one morning, I scribbled on my hand as I sat upright beside my daddy’s bed, listening to his breathing, my breathing….the same.  But by the time I got home, the words were gone – worn to grey, and lost to the illusion of sleep.

Yet, I knew what I wanted to say, what I knew was mine to tell….that this is our treasure. These moments, regardless of how fragile they might seem, are the very threads that sew us together.

A well-meaning friend recently commented that when his father was ill, he had to ‘limit’ the time spent with him, and I wondered how in the world that was possible, and why in the world it would ever be a consideration. What blessings are negated for the comfort of a tv and a remote control……

Surely, we are always wishing for better days, for healing and hope and longevity. But at the heart of living is something deeper than what we know – that this one shining (glimmering) moment is divine, and all we have assurance of.  We cannot expect even one more day or one more morning when the fish are biting and the air is cool, when the mourning doves scuttle across rusty tile, and truth shines through our window as bright as the day we were born.

So, when it comes, in clothes we do not recognize and eyes deeper than the sun is blue, let us not look away for even a moment. Let us never be fooled into believing that tears are anything less than glory, reminders of love we cannot lose, joys we have held closer than the stars.

This is our story, our forever, our inheritance. When all is gone, this is what we have. Time when nothing else mattered but the warmth of a hand in ours, lips that whispered our name, and the quiet still just before dawn.

This………o, yes………..this!

gather now
the aging wheat
and lay the seed aside
so that the sun
will dry
these tears again
tend our hearts
within the joy
we knew would come this way
mornings left us
side by side

how could we then
have known of this –
of other blessings come
of stories yet untold
I listen now
to hear them mend
a tired soul
reminders of the road
miles before and someday
here I’ll be

bless these willing hands
forgive me
let me take of all
I am

. . .

a place not far ~


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5:08 AM

I’ve heard tell
of a place not far
of a moment
together we are
as lovers beginning
breathing as one
a star undimmed
by the dawn
is weaved
into silence
carried by name
when once
we were here
forever the same
a sigh in the darkness
is whispered aloud
becoming the reason
remember me now
in dreams
far removed
from another sweet
when nights
I’m resolved
to come for you

. . .

my reason ~

11:51 PM

stay and tomorrow
will find us this way
near as a beat
to the other
clearing a path
where no one has been
marked in the passing
remember me when
the trees
were but babies
and heaven this close
we touched
without touching
held on letting go
blossoms the color
of Eden removed
and you were my reason
for coming back new
to lie neath
a blanket
of evergreen flame
as one with the stars
by name

as shadows
the reasons we came

. . .


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